Don't Wish Me Merry Xmas

  • Cast Number: 30
  • Run-time: 75 minutes
  • Bible Reference: John 20:31
There is a Christmas Sing-Along at the mall and some people are getting edgy about the mention of Christ as part of Christmas greeting, preferring to be more politically correct with “Happy Holidays” and “Seasons Greetings”.
We need to do our part to put Christ back into Christmas.
Several Christmas carols and Christmas songs are used.

Cast: 30+

Andersons:

Gordon (father)
Hope (mother)
Benjy
Jessa
Tom

Reynolds:

Brian (father)
Virginia (mother)
Merrilee
Samantha

Greens:

Monty (father)
June (mother)
Ronnie
Sydney
Clarisa
Hannah
Sherrie

Santa
Child
Child’s mother
Clown
Tanya (5 yrs old)
Audrey & female friends
Woman 1 & female friends
Man1 & male friends
As many as available for crowd


Set: The set is a mall with a backdrop of stores, a coffee shop to one side

Costumes:
Shoppers would be dressed in (location appropriate) heavier clothing.
Santa costume

Props: coffee cups, sheet music, gifts

Songs: The songs suggested, (except for “Don’t Wish Me Merry Xmas), can be replaced by other songs as desired.
The MP3 files for “Don’t Wish Me Merry Xmas” and “Mary Did You Know?” can be found in the “Script Songs” directory under “TECHNICAL HELP” at the DramaShare website.
The following songs should be readily available, if you need music contact DramaShare:
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
I’m Dreaming Of A White Christmas
The First Noel
Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree
Little Drummer Boy
Santa Claus Is Coming To Town
On The First Day Of Christmas

Sample of script:

busy, noisy store Christmas scene

various persons walk by, saying greetings: “Happy Holidays” . . “Seasons Greetings” . . “Seasons Best” . . “Hope Santa brings you something special” . . “Happy Winter Solstice” etc.

Gordon: This is one busy store! I for one am glad most of our Christmas shopping is behind us.

Benjy: “Most” but not all, right Dad?

Gordon: And just what might be missing off our Christmas shopping list son?

Benjy: Well, just like the TV commercial says, (phoney deep voice) . . “Say Happy Holidays to that special someone on your list with Rock Band under the tree! . . . Rock Band says Season’s Greetings in a way that plain words just can’t do!”

Gordon: Well Benjy, what the TV advertising people don’t understand is that your mother and I are very adept at wishing Merry Christmas, . . in plain words.

Benjy: Should I take that to mean there will be no Rock Band under the tree on Christmas morning?

Gordon: Not unless you can talk the Beatles into making a personal appearance.

Benjy: Maybe I could check with Santa?

Gordon: I have it on very good authority that Santa has no plans for Rock Band in your stocking either Benjy. . . Sorry.

Benjy, smile: Bummer! . . Last time I trust a jolly old man in a big red suit.

Gordon: You are a good kid Benjy!

Benjy: Just think how much better I would be with Rock Band.

person bumps into Jessa, walks away angry

Person1: Wish kids would watch where they are going!

Jessa: Sorry sir!

Hope: It’s OK Jessa, it wasn’t your fault, seems some people’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is long faces and grumpiness.

Jessa: Guess for adults Christmas is a busy time . . . expensive too.

Hope: Yes dear, Christmas can be expensive, busy, noisy, bustling . . . but it can also be fun!

Gordon: Fun huh? . . . Well it should be, but just have a look around at all the uptight faces, and parents screaming at their kids.

Tom, pointing offstage: That woman over there told her kids, “One more peep outta you guys and we go straight home!”

Hope: Sad isn’t it? . . . Some parents miss the whole point, it’s Christmas, a joyous time, time to have some fun!

Gordon points off stage

Gordon: There’s our neighbours, the Reynolds, doesn’t look as though they are having a really great time either!

Brian, Virginia, Merrilee & Samantha come on stage, arguing

Brian: I am up to here with you guys, now for the last time will you knock it off?

Virginia: Lay off the kids Brian, people all around us are listening to your rant.

Brian: Well, look, Mrs. Mother-of-the-year! . . I don’t see you trying to control these kids of yours!

Virginia: So now they are my kids?

Brian: Look Virginia, maybe you teach them a bit about how to act in public it just might help!

Virginia: Or maybe they are just watching you, following their father’s example!

Merrilee: I didn’t want to be hauled down here anyhow, I am bored!

Samantha: Me too, I don’t see why we needed to come with you guys! . . . My friend Brenda was having a party, all my friends will be there, but nooooo, I have to be with my dumb parents!

Brian: Look Samantha, and you too Merrilee, I told you flat out a couple of weeks ago we were setting aside today for a family day, buying stuff for Christmas! . . And today’s the day, OK?

Merrilee: This is just sick!

Virginia: Merrilee that is no way to talk to your father! . . Besides, we will have fun . . . We need to pick out a Christmas gift for you girls.

Samantha: Oh good grief, please not another . . (mimics her mother) . . . “Oh dear, you will just love the gift we selected for you!”

Brian: One more crack like that and you, young lady, will be grounded for a year! . . Now we are here to have fun as a family, so let’s get started . . . Now Merrilee, what would you like for a special Christmas gift this year?

Merrilee: Cut out the middle man, just give me money.

Virginia: I refuse to give money for a Christmas gift, it is so . . . impersonal!

Samantha: Face it Mom, any lame gift you get for us we will just return for cash on Boxing Day anyhow.

Brian: You listen to me young lady . . You will accept what we give you, you will be excited with what we give you, you will treasure what we give you . . even if I have to bolt your gift onto your ungrateful bodies!

Virginia sees the Anderson family, tries to warn Brian, Samantha and Merrilee to cool it

Brian: And what is more, I am just fed up with this whole attitude lately . . I want to tell you that . . .

Virginia, embarrassed: Uhhh Brian dear, see who’s here . . the Andersons . . .

Brian, stumbling to speak: I . . uhhh . . oh my . . I was just saying to the family here, nice to be out as a family . . (reaches out to shake Gordon’s hand) . . Happy Holidays to you, neighbour!

Gordon: Merry Christmas Brian . . Virginia . . Merry Christmas girls!

Hope, Benjy, Jessa & Tom speak to their counterparts:Merry Christmas!

Virginia responds to Hope’s greeting in an embarrassed way, Merrilee & Samantha just roll their eyes, look away

Gordon: So Brian, you guys spending Christmas in the city this year?

Brian: Nah, we are booked for Mazatlan, leave the cold miserable weather behind for a few days of relaxation.

Hope: How nice Virginia, you will be looking forward to a holiday with the two of you and the girls.

Brian: The girls? . . No way, the girls are staying with Virginia’s folks. . . That kind of holiday wouldn’t be right for kids.

Gordon: Oh, but it’s just not Christmas if you aren’t together as a family.

Samantha: Christmas alone will make the perfect holiday for us.

Brian, mad: You two, go sit in the car, NOW!

Merrilee: With great pleasure father dear, come on Samantha!

Samantha and Merrilee leave the stage

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