Knights Of The Rectangle Roundtable

  • Cast Number: 11
  • Run-time: 75 minutes
  • Bible Reference: 1.Samuel 16-25

 5 part (5 day) series for children is to be used in VBS or other children’s program.
It is based (very loosely) on King Arthur and the knights of the Round Table, (with our apologies to the original authors).
The themes for each day are:
Day 1: Seek  1 Samuel 16:1-13
Day 2: Ready  1 Samuel 17:32-51
Day 3: Serve  1 Samuel 18:1-16
Day 4:  Mercy  1 Samuel 24:1-15
Day 5: Humility  1 Samuel 25:4-35
 

Bible Reference:         see above

 

Cast:                11 (7 of which are onstage, 4 are offstage narrators, could be taped)

King Carter (King) husband of Lady Gummibear
Lady Gummibear (Gummi) wife of King Carter
Sir Moped (Moped)
Merle the Lizard (Merle) (yes he is actually a lizard)
Sir Laffsalot (Laff)
Sir Gallonhead (GH)
Sir Kay (Kay) (yes there is a female knight)

Narrators 1, 2, 3 & 4

                       

Set:                  can be as plain or elaborate as required/desired
The main set piece is a large table and some chairs

 

Lighting:       standard

 

Sound:           as available, microphones are helpful

 

Costumes:     as available, medieval knights and kings costumes would be nice
Merle’s costume could be interesting, a lizard

 

Props:            staff (cane) for Merle, large hat for Sir Gallonhead, cardboard helmets for all children, papers

 

Special Instructions:  
the song which runs through the drama can be just a tuneless rap
During the narrated Bible readings some actors will mime some of the emotions and actions. These may be the same onstage actors or a different group. If possible we suggest that these mime actors be among the children, encouraging the children to mime their own emotions.

 

Time:             approximately 15 minutes per segment, 75 minutes total

 

Script:           

 

DAY 1

A Heart After God: God Chooses David

1 Sam. 16:1-13 (SEEKS GOD)

 

Sir Laffsalot (Laff), Sir Gallonhead (GH), Sir Kay, wander on stage from various spots, look around nervously, check watches, look at each other suspiciously

 

Laff, giggle:    Hey, you guys look like you are waitin’ around, likely here for the same reason I am?

 

GH, haughty:  I don’t think so! . . . Forsooth, I was invited here . .  for a special project, one of a kind opportunity . . . only the best in the land shall qualify, . . . superior knights is what they seek . . . .  And, forsooth, that would be me!

 

Laff, giggle:    Wow! . .  I was invited as well . . . Become a Knight Of The Rectangle Round Table.

 

GH, haughty:  You have heard of the Knights of the Rectangle Round Table? . . Really now . . . I am surprised! . . . And . . forsooth, . . . whom . .  might you be?

 

Laff, giggle:    Whom . . you ask? . . . Well I’m might be any whom . . but actually they call me . . (proud) . . .  Sir Laffsalot!

 

GH:                 Well all I can say is . . . a very, very silly name!

 

Laff, giggle:    Exactly! . . . . And that is the whole point! . .  You see, I . . am . .  silly!  (giggles)
But whom sir . .  are you’m?
Likely Sir Forsooth somebody or other . . on account of you do a lot of forsoothing. . . (giggles)

 

GH:                 I . .  am none other than . . (salutes with hat, bows) . . .  Sir . .  Gallonhead!

 

Laff, giggles, rubs the top of GH’s head:     
Wow, I would have had you figured out at maybe three quarts, maximum.

 

GH, shock:      You, sir, touched our person!

 

Laff, giggle:    No actually I rubbed your head . . . kinda like this . . (rubs GH’s head again)

 

GH, angry:      Be gone thou scurfy knave!

 

Laff, giggles, runs fingers through his own hair:    
I know, I shampooed my hair and I can’t do a thing with it!

 

Kay timidly approaches other actors

 

Kay:                Excuse me, are you guys here to be interviewed for the Knights of the Rectangle Round Table, same as I am?

 

GH, points at Laff:    
Himself is hoping to be interviewed, (aside), small hope for that one for sure!
Myself on the other hand will need no interview, one look at myself and I shall, unquestionably, be given the seat of honor at the Rectangle Round Table.

 

Kay, confused:            Excuse me . .  but how can a rectangle table . .  be a .. round table . .  sir?

 

GH, losing patience
Commoners! . . . . Forsooth, what would they do without myself?
As you can plainly see, our room is small, and it is square!
Now knowing this, think it through . .  a round table . . . would simply not fit . . in a square room . . .

 

Kay:                Then why not just call it Knights of the Rectangle Table?

 

GH:                 Tiring! . . . Tiring! . .  This is forsooth becoming tiring!
Exactly when have you ever heard of knights sitting around a rectangle table?
No, a rectangle round table it shall be.
(GH looks at Kay, bewildered)
And forsooth . .  whom should you be, and why are you here, may we ask?

 

Kay:                Well . .  who I should be . .  and am, actually . . . is Sir Kay.

 

GH is so shocked that he almost falls over, holds on

 

Laff, giggle:    Good to meet up with you Sir Kay, I am called Sir Laffsalot, on account’a I laughs a lot.

 

GH, angry, to Laff:    
Don’t you dare say “good to meet up with you” ‘cause she can’t be a Knight of the Rectangle Round Table . . . she is a (curls lip in disgust) . . . ewwwwww . . . . girl!

 

Kay:                And what is wrong in a girl being a Knight of the Rectangle Round Table?

 

GH is in shock, speechless, then starts to laugh uncontrollably

 

GH:                 Oh, my! . . . My, my, my, my, my, my!
That is sooooo rich!
A . . . girl . .  being a Knight of the Rectangle Round Table!
Next thing you will be telling us is that . . . children . . could be Knights of the Rectangle Round Table!

 

Kay:                Well . . . why couldn’t children be Knights of the Rectangle Round Table? . .
(walks downstage, points to all the children in the audience)
In case you didn’t notice we have a lot of children here!

 

Laff, giggle, walks downstage and among the children:      
Wow, I never noticed! . .  There is like a gazillion children here! . . Wow! And I’m sure all you guys wanna be Knights of the Rectangle Round Table, right?
(works the audience to get children wanting to volunteer)
What about you guys? . . And you guys? . . Everybody needs to be a Knight of the Rectangle Round Table, right?

 

GH:                 That shall never happen! . .  Forsooth the King will forbid it happen!

 

Merle the Lizard, King Carter and Lady Gummibear come on stage

 

Merle:             Hear ye, hear ye! . . . Announcing King Carter and his wife, the lovely Lady Gummibear!

 

Laff, giggle:    Wow! . .  Impressive! . . . And who might you be ..  oh guy with the high pitched voice, carrying the stick with a sharp thingie on the end?

 

Merle:             I sir . .  am Merle the Lizard! . . . And this . . (strikes the floor with his stick) . .  is how I catch my food! . . . (takes imaginary something off the end and puts it in his mouth) . . . Mmm mmm! . . . Deeeelicious!

 

all actors react, grossed out

 

GH:                 Your Majesty . . . this  . . . (pointing to Kay, repulsed) . . .  person . .  not only wishes that she, . .  an .. . ewwww . . . girl . . . might be a Knight of the Rectangle Round Table . . but she has the nerve to suggest that . .  (points to audience) . . . children might be welcome as Knights of the Rectangle Round Table well! . .  I tried my best to explain . . . but . . .

 

King:               And you are?

 

GH, bows with flourish:        
Your majesty’s humble servant . .  Sir Gallonhead.

 

King:               Well Sir Gallonhead, of course you are right . . . we would be proud to have this lovely lady as a Knight of Rectangle Round Table! . . . And these wonderful children as well . .

 

GH, confused: We would . . .?  That is . . . (phoney smile) . ..  Of course we would . . . Exactly what I said . . .

 

Gummi:          Good, so then you . .  Sir Gallonhead . .  shall hand out the knight’s helmets to all of the children . . .

 

GH:                 But . .  but . . . that will mean I have to .. . . touch the . . .  children persons!

 

King:               And what an honor that will be Sir Gallonhead! . . . (hands helmets to GH)  Now you take these helmets, hand them out to all the children . . . and . .  all the rest of you . . (gives helmets to the others) . .   Sir Kay . .  Sir Laffsalot . .  and all the other adults here, seek to make sure every one of my subjects here are made into Knights of the Rectangle Round Table.

 

actors, (except King and Gummi), and helpers move among the children, ensure every child has a helmet

 

Gummi:          What a beautiful sight dear husband King! . . . Seeking out the children to make them Knights of the Rectangle Round Table!

 

King:               A beautiful sight it is indeed my dear wife, Lady Gummibear!
(to children)
Can anyone tell me what knights in the olden days did?

 

actors and leaders urge children to respond, when they do, have microphones available for them to speak

 

King:               Lady Gummibear my dear, as you can see we have some very intelligent young knights with us today!

 

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