Three Thieves

  • Cast Number: 6
  • Run-time: 15 minutes
  • Bible Reference: Proverbs 22:22
There are three thieves on the loose and they are out to steal the joy of the Christians.
Cast: 6
Thief #1 - Brains of the gang, serious, no-nonsense, impatient
Thief #2 - Easy-going, laid-back
Thief #3 - Clueless and clumsy and not entirely intelligent
Policewoman - No nonsense, alert and serious
Women #1- Cheerful, loving and joyful
Women #2 - Encouraging and friendly

Sample of script:

Scene opens with three thieves tiptoeing onstage. Imagine they are on the street outside of storefronts. Theme from “The Pink Panther” is playing as they tiptoe across stage…music fades out

Thief #1 Okay, we’re almost there – don’t make a sound! It’s very important you be as quiet as possible! We mess this up and we’re gonna be in BIG TROUBLE, you got me?

Thief #2 Take it easy man, it’s not like the world will fall apart if we don’t find it – we can always get it somewhere else if we don’t get it here!

Thief #3 Yeah, if we don’t get it here, we can always get it somewhere else!

Thief #2 That’s what I just said, man. Boy, you need to land on this planet soon!

Thief #3 Yeah, land soon…uh, where are we going again?

Thief #1 Would you two shut up! I don’t know how many times I have to tell you to be quiet! Do ya want to get caught? If we get caught again, we’re going away for a long time this time – I’ll tell you that right now! So keep your traps shut if you know what’s good for ya!

Thief #2 Hey, who’s that? It looks like a cop!

Thief #1 It is the cops, quick! Hide!

all three take a step back as if they are hiding in the shadows – making exaggerated movements to suggest they are creeping back into the shadows against a building. All three freeze as a police officer walks by

Policewoman enters scene, whistling as she strolls by, having a suspicious look on her face and looking around as if she suspects that something is going on

Policeman Hmmm, I thought I heard something down this way…well, maybe not. You can’t be too careful nowdays. Lots of precious gifts around here, never know who’ll want to steal it!

policewoman continues on her way, begins to whistle again…goes offstage

Thief #1 Whoa, that was close! I hate it when we almost get caught – the stress is enough to give me a heart attack!

Thief #3 I know what you mean boss, heh-heh, remember the time we were trying to rob that Miss Goody-Two-Shoes who was always helping everybody in her church? We came awful close to getting busted that time –I thought I was gonna fall right on the ground dead away when that cop came running!

Thief #2 Yeah man, but we got her good didn’t we? After we were done with her, she didn’t want to help anybody after that! We pretty much squashed any ambition she had as far as helping anyone in the future!

Thief #1 Yeah, that was great! A real victory for our side on that one. She was a good example of not applying what she was taught! But, we don’t have time for yapping now –it’s time to focus on what we need to do tonight.

Thief #2: Okay, boss. Like, what’s the plan for this one?

Thief #3: Plan? There’s a plan? I guess I’d better pay attention – I wouldn’t want to mess up or anything!

Thief #1 Yeah, you wouldn’t want to mess up because I’ll mess you up if you do!

Thief #2 All right boss, just relax, everything will be a-okay! So like, give us the details…

Thief #1 Okay, here’s how it goes…. The ladies are meeting for their monthly fellowship in about 15 minutes. Our victim is one of those women who is always going around making everyone else feel special, building everyone up with her positive attitude. She’s always happy, smiling and, yuk- SINGING!

Thief #2 I know what you mean man, one can only take so much joy!

Thief #3 Uh, so like how exactly are we gonna rob this lady of her joy?

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