Going Where

  • Cast Number: 3
  • Run-time: 12 minutes
  • Bible Reference: John 14:5-6
Knowing the way. This comedy deals with people thinking that it is a destination on a map. A silly script which is very useful in pointing out the message in John 14:5-6

Sample of script:

Tom and Arnie come on stage, followed shortly by Ted.

Ted: Hi, Tom, Arnie, what ya doin’?

Tom: Not much, Arnie was just tellin’ me about Ellie, did ya know she’s goin’ away?

Ted: Going away? Ellie? No way!

Tom: Yup, she is. Tell, him, Tom, tell him what you told me. Go on, tell him!

Arnie: Ellie’s goin’ away.

Tom: See, just like I said, Ellie’s goin’ away, isn’t that just what I told ya? So what d’ya think about that news?

Ted: Now, that is a surprise. Ellie. Going away. Where’s she going to?

Tom: Goin’? Going where?

Ted: Ahhh, I just asked that! Earth to Tom! Ellie’s going away, where is she going to?

Tom: No idea. All I know, she’s goin’! Yup, goin’ away, all right!

Ted: I believe we have fully established that Ellie is going away. What we need to develop is, to just where is Ellie going?

Tom: To just where? (short pause, thinking) Not sure I know that. Arnie never told me. Go ahead then Arnie, tell him you never told me where to Ellie is goin’.

Arnie: I never told him where to Ellie is goin’.

Ted: Well, look, somebody must know where Ellie is going! Who told you Ellie is going away, anyway?

Tom: I already told ya that, Arnie told me Ellie is goin’ away! Look, Arnie, tell Ted Ellie is goin’ away.

Arnie: Ellie is goin’ away.

Ted: Do you two have any idea the magnitude of your frustration potential?

Tom: Speakin’ only jist fer myself, caint say I do. (hums, sings, off key) “The magnetittude of your . . . first a-shush . . .. Sorry, maybe, you wuz ta hum a bar er two? Arnie, you ever heard of “the magnetitude of yer first a-shush somethin’ pernenchul”? Have ya, Arnie?Arnie: I never did once heard of the, . . . the . . . , I never heard of the . . . whatever he said.

Tom: See that, Arnie, he never heard of it either.

Ted: What I said was, . . . oh, forget it! Now can someone tell me where Ellie is going?

Tom: No, can’t. Arnie, he just told me that Ellie said, “You’ll know where I am goin’. Is that not what you said to me, Arnie? You tell him, Arnie.

Arnie: Yup, I said to Tom, I said, “Ellie said, ‘You’ll know where I’m goin.’”

Tom: See, isn’t that just what I just told ta? Ellie, she said, you’ll know . . . .

Ted: I know what you said that Arnie said that Ellie said . . . . Ohhh! Well, surely Ellie left some hint about where she was going!

Tom: Likely ta Paris, France, my guess.

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